complicated
feelin totali shit. can those practicali shit ppl go to hell? ecks. haiz. though it's new year, it juz made mi realise how vulnerable families are. dey juz cant change. not to b taboo or anything, but once the ppl of e previous generation pass away, i would b alone by then. with my so called cousin ish of no use. we are like water and fire. intolerable. life. perphaps.
darn it. i'm stil sick. current record of highest temp: 39.2 degrees. average temp: 38.0 degrees. it never reaches a stable temp cans. guess i would stil b goin to sch tomorrow. fer the performance ya. it's nice slacking at home. not nice to hav headaches and stupid burning sensation all over my body. not nice to hav piles and loads of homework. frankly, overally, it's NOT NICE to be SICK! arrgghh. virul infection. ya. wth.
wahahahahas. u noe dere's sumthing i found out and ish damn freaking funni. nvm. it doesnt matter loads to mi though. i had been through that in sec 1 and i do realise the hardships u will be receiving in future. i've grown up. if i care a damn about all those negative stuffs in the world, i guess i would be HANGING myself now. yes, i noe dere are sumthings that i realised that we 'must have been' overdoing. and i dun realli care about fame n stuffs. wen i'm given the job, i try my best to do it and i wont want any cock ups in between. that's one of my rules in life. well, if it wasnt fer dis, i wouldnt have been told a workaholic by docs. i'm not the preppy type of ppl, i classify myself as a goth, though i rarely make up like one. i do things by heart. there was once a person who claimed to feel remorseful about not pinning up her hair. i did. i did it by pinning my hair in a whole NEW way! of course, i'm stil proud of it. wahahax, here comes egoistic joanna. i do what i sae. no matter wat, i'm stil freaking sick. 37.4 degrees now. dey are mi BESTEST BEST frens. dere are sum things i hav to sae. basically, i dun care wat ppl sae abt us. if u cared, trust me, u would hav been called a dog. ooopss, it's dog year ya know? ;) to me, seniors played a serious role. my seniors i shld sae. i nvr brought this topic up before but i guess i hav to sae it now. i hav found the good ppl and 'bad' ppl. i once was framed. misunderstood. fcuking leading the worst life ever. it was they who gave mi dat life and who pulled mi up again. not mani ppl wil experience dat, i seriously noe that kinda feelings. yes, i cried. i was depressed. but guess wat, i wasnt a dog. i'm not taking any sides and this ish not a wat e hell shooting entry. i'm juz sorta showing a disclosed side of my life. if not fer them, i guess i would hav been juz as weak. it's fer them that i'm so strong. thanks though. (no sarcasm. thanks.) why do ya hav to make things to be so complicated? frankly, i dunno. if dey had pinpointed mi at that time, mayb i would hav changed and not take things the rough way. dats ppl u see, DIFFERENCE. a big word. i dun deserve respect cuz i dun realli show respect. if i had showed respect, i wouldnt even be blogging now. i would hav hid and cried somewhere. sorri, i'm not the respect and miss-popular kinda gals. i'm more of myself. dere was once said, the world doesnt revolve around u. i asked, if it doesnt revolve mi, does it revolve around u? ans is the world ish revolving on its own axis. i'm not trying to show a dumb example but that's the point of my blog. if u tried to think, "omg, i'm so bad dat the whole world almost hates mi!" and trying to change urself to suit the ppl ish not my way of things. i do it my way. if i changed, isnt dat too unfair fer mi? take ppl the way dey are. i dun blame anyone fer the hard life i lead, it's the big word again. if others are not able to accept u, dun try to accept them because u are rejecting urself. if the world ish revolving on its own, den i shall take it as it's revolving around mi cuz it's my life. i take charge. be urself n u dun hav to care abt others. that's the rationale (wonder if i spelled correctly.) tats to my dearie poopoos of course. i luv them. mayb one dae we wil separate but it's not the long-term, it's the heart u put in. once u nvr regret, u nvr do sumthin bad to ur heart (no heart disease aye =)). i stil luv my hair n i dun regret. cuz it's juz so DAMN NICE larhx. i finalli realise a way how to pin it nicely at the studio. hahas. i dun expect anyone to listen to mi nor anything cuz i seriously understand dat i dun deserve it. cuz i dun listen to others either. even if the whole world ish unhappi wif mi, i'm happi wif myself and pretties. that's my way of rebellion, i dun do rebellion the way normal ppl see as. i rebel in my way. REBELLION. MY WAY. that's so egoistic of mi. wahahax. end of my stupid entry. lemme clarify again, dis ish not a SHOOTING entry, it's MY LIFE entry.
kkaes. currently sick due to virus infection. suspected virus: dengue fever. [i suspected it myself larhx.] went home early todae. now ish 12.41 pm, 24/1/2006. highest temperature: 38.2. wont be back to school until thursdae. juz ate medicine and goin to fall asleep le. doc sae muz rest more, i bet it worsen bcuz of all the tight shedules and all. so gonna chiong maths at home cuz i onli got 7.5/20. pathetic rites. nvm, i'll continue towork hard de. jiayous! take care kaes. dun fall sick like mi. =(
okaes. i realised sumthing abt my blog. the dates for posts are always one dae later. i post about sundae give mi saturdae. kkaes, nvm. i'll stil take care to it. todae ish 23/1. mondae. sch stil sux as usual. den went to studio to take costume. went for my guitar lesson and realised sumthing. i didnt touch my guitar for the past whole week. i'm so unused to it an of course i played badly. for my theory lessons, it's worse. i'm gonna take the exam in march and i cant even rem all the majors and minor keys. ooops. i'm a stupid student. dumbass in almost everything. klutziness 100%. forget it. life ish stil so unstable. dunno wat to sae. stress everywhere. xian. i wanna help but i dunno where to start. i hate to see them quarrel. made me cry everytime she told mi abt what he took again. returned? i wonder how long we can stand. it's not everytime that u are so lucky. arhx. parents. mayb i would stil cry in the past but i guess now i wont. no matter how serious it gets. ya, family always shun family when it comes to 'stuffs'. i've got less relative. hahas. i guess i juz hav to accept it. al'rite aye. luv grandad foreva. ;))
okaes. gonna talk abt chingay stuffs and all. first thing, i sorta pulled/tore my musle. frankly i dunno which ish which. why? cuz i gei kiang can one hand carry the lion. right hand carry nothing happened, juz when i wanted to change hand, i pulled my left hand muscle. Eck. damn stupid reason lorhx. accident prone for almost all big events. SYF - hurt my leg. Chingay - hurt my hand. i wonder what still can happen for other events. yesterdae was the first Chingay rehearsal. not to say much about what really happened, but i sorta don't feel right about yesterdae. that's all. i was totally frustrated. the music was so loud dat i can't even hear myself shout though i tried my best to. i nearly fall to death because of the poster and cameras are still shooting. i really wanna hit the man wif my guun lorhx. nvm. my flops for yesterdae. gonna try to improve on it. haiz. school stuffs. i dun understand a shit the teachers are talking about. i really don't or is it i refuse to take in. i dunno. both maths sux. the word die simply replaces everything. haiz. wth, if i'm gonna carry on this way, i don't think i'm gonna pass o levels in anyway. okae. maybe except chinese. later gonna go find the physician to see my hand again. haiz. i juz wondered now we are all 15 and responsiblities juz got more and more. and we can't change it, once we reach a certain age, we juz hav to accept it. can't we juz go back and live simply as ever? =)
darrn
Darrn tired todae cans. played bball wif anqi, simin and yingxin and i was like the last one to reach but i shot a 3 point ball! Woots. Zhuai arhx. Tomorrow got dance and i'm darn tired, so i dun tink i wanna do hw. Arhx. I'm a lag student. Went to Mac after bball match and we were like talking abt childhood life again. Like how I still have e rubber/ metal chain to attach to our wallets in pri. school and how funny were their sisters and brothers. Good day. Btw, I finalli figured out how to pin my hair in a better way! Tidy and nice. The pins wont come flying out after I danced. Yepp. So, i'm goiing to sleep. Sweet dreams and all. ArrRRRHHH.
goofy. i'm on a destress mood. Arhx. I shld b doing my work but i'm ramming my ears wif blink-182's First date. that song rawks. but overally, the Greatest Hits by Blink-182 ish rawko. woo, i haven thought of a new year resolultion but i dun tink i'm gonna think much abt it. cuz it's juz random. the past year had been a good one with all the ups and downs. wif all my frens and everyone dat sttod beside me. yepp. i'm glad that's all. it's gonna be a new year and i wan new mi! dats all. waha. random saneness. thePretties theMads. PooPoo.
Poof. Good day aye. Loadsa homework and i'm still thinking about what happened yesterdae. :))Haha, it's so funni larhx. Went to take taxi wif jeanette, audrey and ivy after dance. We were lyk 'taktitaktitakti' all the way. Den went to kfc and some gals got the seat before us lorhx. Oooohh. Twister guy/game. Hahas and after our meal, jeanette n me went to buy some new year sweets to bribe our parents. Hahas, scheming arhx. And ivy was kiapped between e tap card thing lorhx. So funni. Lols. That's all fer yesterdae and we countdown fer jiebo lahx. So todae ish oso considered his bdae. Happi bdae jiebo! He's so old. Ooops. =)) Btw, y i update at diff times and e entry was same as yesterdae de. Nvm, i was writing abt e same dae aniway.
..Today was like erm...Great of course! Haha. E KFC session was so funny and we were like so spas. Nvm. Tired of the medicine making mi go to sleep. See, thePretties : theMads. That's all. Haha. I'm happy and decided to be sweet and changed e blogskin. =) Crap.
New year, new blogskin. Nice slogan aye. =))
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