BEHOLD THE PRINCESS

False Evidence that Appears Real

Fear. Well, you would need courage to overcome it but where and how do you get courage?

Life's been so lackadaiscal for me. Well, i jolly well know that i'm not very often at home and seriously, mum's free for three days and she went to stay with aunt. Now she comes back complaining about me keep going out. And what i wanted? Just to watch pirates. myself. Yes. Myself. What's so wrong that i gotta busy schedules nowadays and even if i seek her consent, she says 'no', i try to convince her, i'm deemed as treating her as dead cause i don't listen to her. Blahx. I have developed a thing for home, and that is i don't like to go home. It's so lacking of the family feelings. It feels more like a place for me to sleep and use computer. That's all. Whenever i'm home, i'm all alone. No one there for me to talk to or worse, when there's someone, we ended up quarrelling. I'm sick. They always work and complain that it's my fault but please, i have a life of my own and it's just the way how i was brought up. From young when i was always forced to stay at home, nobody played with me cause everybody's busy working for my future. I sang to myself, even talked to myself and i once thought i was crazy. Nobody cared. I don't wish to care now. After all this while, i have grown to be more immune to things. Isolation is far more better for me. I'm better off alone.

After the competition, passion for singing still burns and i won't give up. I know life's always been like that. Not that smooth sailing for me. Guess it would never would. I'm just frustrated. Why it all my fault? Why is it that i have to be the one giving in? They are afterall adults! Please, i know they undergo so much pressure but do they understand what i'm going through? Just that i don't meet what they want and i'm deemed as shit. Why not i kill myself then wouldn't things be easier? Then they don't have to spend so much energy on me. I'm not gonna commit suicide anyway. Just a sudden outburst of feelings. Then is the problem with communication breakdown. Serious, we hadn't had a good talk and i guess everyone's busy but that's not the issue. They just don't seem to see the whole picture. Things doesn't seem right. I'm too dominant in wanting things my way. I know that. But i think my requests are not that demanding anyway. Blahx. Yeah, ends up giving me those shit attitudes. Is staying at home so interesting? Facing four walls and a comp infront? Yeah. Pretty interesting huh?

Hmmmmm. We better do some talkings. Or else things would worsen. Yeah, i'm fine. Just you know, better off alone. Yay, sing along with my karaoke songs. Haha. Lucks everyone!

# posted by Jolim at 9:22 PM

aiyo. todae reali unlucky arhx. chem spa e burette got an odd hole dere keep squirtin e maganate solution out all over the place. den at dance, shuang ren wu wif chen, den land straight on my butt. is tong dao. eck. muz let it slow slow heal le. haiyo. den wen my dad on e lights of e masterbed room, it stil works. but wen it came under my hands, e stupid light jux wont light up for my pathetic sake. haiz. dis is life. blahx. x)

# posted by Jolim at 7:04 AM

woots. finalli ended e competition! wasnt sad or anything. juz sorri dat made ppl waste their monei. bu hao yi si lehx. haha. it's jux a 'game'. face it with a smile! =) take it easy ppl. for e contestants who got in, go go go! haha.

# posted by Jolim at 10:11 AM

today's the day. heyhey. i onli noe dat i wasnt on the right track as i'm not in the right mood. how come so glum? i seriously dont know and wont know why. should have thought of this even before it started. it was expected but i guess it's just about taking it in that's the difficult part. every start has an end. eventually. but whatever. sk8ter boi still rocks. yepp. huo chu qu le! =)

He was a boy She was a girl
Can i make it any more obvious
He was a punk
She did ballet
What more can i say
He wanted her
She'd never tell secretly she wanted him as well
But all of her friends
Stuck up their nose
They had a problem with his baggy clothes

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
She had a pretty face
But her head was up in space
She needed to come back down to earth

5 years from now
She sits at home
Feeding the baby she's all alone
She turns on tv
Guess who she sees
Skater boy rockin up MTV
She calls up her friends
They already know
And they've all got
Tickets to see his show
She tags along
Stands in the crowd
Looks up at the man that she turned down

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slamming on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?

He was a skater boy
She said see you later boy
He wasn't good enough for her
Now he's a super star
Slamming on his guitar
Does your pretty face see what he's worth?

Sorry girl but you missed out
Well tough luck that boy's mine now
We are more than just good friends
This is how the story ends
Too bad that you couldn't see,
See the man that boy could be
There is more that meets the eye I see the soul that is inside

He's just a boy
And Im just a girl
Can I make it any more obvious
We are in love
Haven't you heard
How we rock eachothers world

I'm with the skater boy
I said see you later boy
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at the studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know

I'm with the skater boy
I said see you later boy
I'll be back stage after the show
I'll be at the studio
Singing the song we wrote
About a girl you used to know

# posted by Jolim at 4:51 PM

hmmms. tml is e semifinals. yepp. gotta b earli for preparation n stuffs. seriousli, i'm not prepared. cuz it's sorta busy nowadaes. but nvm, huo chu qu jiu hao le bahx. thanks to those who r goin to b dere n morally supportin mi. yepp. =) take care my gals.

# posted by Jolim at 8:17 AM

mwahaha! i'm so happi now! mummy bought me two nice dresses! she's so nice. suddenly realise maybe parents are just not good at showing their concern and they tend to over scold. but in the end they are still so sweet and such. i wanna watch pirates todae!! Sk8ter Boi rocks. bwahaha. =)

# posted by Jolim at 6:43 PM

Hmms. Suddenly gotta reflect on this, can people really bury their hatchet? If they can, then it would be best. But if they can't? Then it's nightmare. People really gotta change alot to adapt to this kinda environment. They get some what ostracised, marginalised or even shunned. But whatever it is, i hope this would eventually resolve and everything would be fine again ayes. Hurts to see people being like that and things worsen every time they try to salvage it. People really tend to try too hard.

Humph! Can't watch Pirates of the Caribbean cause of two tests tml and i'm still very frustrated. Can only watch it this sunday. Hmmmm, i miss Jack Sparrow and Will Turner! They are so cool! Thanks to xinyu for the tickets. =) I shall watch it! Pirates, here i come!

# posted by Jolim at 6:07 AM

muahaha. finally aft ndp n i hav time to update! zhiyong arhx. my little son. take care of ur wound arhx. haha. den jiu shi, i'm so happi to see sze n yw together. take care my sis. =) hmmm. have a sudden crave to learn gals hip hop but dunno where to go. so tired. blah. yawns. think i shall go sleep again. bb.

# posted by Jolim at 10:01 PM

Yay, finally being able to update. Life's been more on slacking and eating and sleeping and such except homework. Yeah, sorta screwed it anyway. Don't feel like giving a damn. Just finished guitar exam and guess it wont turn out well. And i missed my shpping trip thanks to the musical. Shit. Should have turned it down and it wouldn't have caused so much trouble. Sorry my gal. The next thing coming up is olevels chinese oral, i'm not gonna flunk it. Then it's going to be the teenage icon semi-finals. Yeah, it is fun and i really loved the way they styled my hair the other time. It took about 30-45 minutes. Muaha, i'm crazy. Gonna change blogskin in a few weeks time. Them i suddenly thought of this, am i over enthusiastic in my cca? But i seriously don't think so. Well, my classmates prob me to ask this question. I just can't reach a balance. Aha. I don't know why anyway. Whatever. Heck. Bye. =) Take care people.

# posted by Jolim at 11:59 PM

woots. ndp's tiring n such. cant realli make out wat i'm doin now. totalli confused. yeah. hate ppl who dun fulfill their promise. but watever, i've got no power to judge or anything. sad excuses n false hopes high, dun send ppl to heaven n drop dem liddat. it's not funny. how dem can b jerks. now i realise y. no point arguing. it wont help anyway. i dunno how i feel, guess dat it wont b e same n much more difficult. i'll hav to learn anyway. hmmm. ya. learn n it wont b e same.

# posted by Jolim at 7:35 PM