haiz,watashi no (my) life hor...beri luan de nehx...confused over y n how 2 lyk a person...oso hw...how to do hah?? i half way chiongin hw, half way writin this message and half way sleepin...siao liao la...actuali i was lyk half mad,half sad, half happi, half cry...half everytin la...dunno y,suddenly an urge of feelin told mi dat i shld give up, give up on the thingys i use to hold on to and things i wanted to hold on now...why? i'm so tired, juz lemme go...i reali wanna run away, can i ever escape? haha, i thought of suicide b4 and i tried...but nvr succeed..i guo bu liao guan...mayb givin up is da best afterall...y did i become so sang qi de hah? i use to b a stubborn gal who go against those who go against mi de mah...lol,fang shou ye xu zui hao bu guo...itz been a long time since i cried, long long time n i juz cant cry...nvm...i wil let go of things i cant reach or get...but hui tou kan, what did i got in return?? nothing...nothing..nothing...so sad, heaven blessed mi wif a gd famili n everythin but y cant i juz feel safe? i dunno, i juz feel hurt n sad everytym i m daydreamin in class...but nvr kana scold la :p...or juz laugh lyk hell wif xe 2 make mi feel "happier"...at least i wont feel da pain at dat time...i juz feel dat i lost many thingys...my character (basically itz more siao n sassy than now), my stubbornity (new word ah invented and copyrighted by Jolim)(duno got tis word or not,aiyah,juz use la)in things, my siaoness, my tears, my everythin...i feel lyk a walkin zombie at times...dunno y...juz feelin...i tink i shld oso giv up on him(s)...lol...k...dun tok abt my "halfs" liao...tok abt sch...

haiyah, 2dae got a new job: to make a list of da ppl in modern dance...haiyo..kana saboh lor...nvm..."i wil work till death 4 dance" si er hou yi ah...nvm i ask seniors 2 help mi get their level de name list den i collade (dunno how 2 spell la) lor...hai, my eng is gonna dang diao again...k lar...sleepin le, den wake up at 3am 2 do hw...bb...